dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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