i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
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