I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
