school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
