okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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