In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
