He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
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