y did u give ur computer a hand job?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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