apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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