I think I died a long time ago.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I wish you could order shots online.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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