i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
MIDGETS
????
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
