Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Put some vodka in it
put some vodka in it
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.