people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
