well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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