we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
