I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
