Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
