I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
