Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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