This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
