I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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