piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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