I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Farmville is her only friend.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I would ride that face into the sunset
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
