the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
