every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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