i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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