Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible

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(443): View more from Maryland

He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him

Fav 19 1657 4346
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(207): View more from Maine

My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense

Fav 11 6662 1387
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(805): View more from California

That bad?

(1-805): View more from California

Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.

Fav 14 1229 4996
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(210): View more from Texas

I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.

Fav 23 5330 1481
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.

Fav 8 1318 3080
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody

Fav 12 2939 1055
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?

Fav 1 427 122
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(310): View more from California

How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?

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