pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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