Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
