Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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