Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
