I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
your address is 607B right?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.