puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
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