My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
