I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
