I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
