just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
