All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize