3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize