I want to have your abortion
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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