I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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