Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
