HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
