I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Don't EVER smell your tampon
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
