WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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