after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
