i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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