If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Randomize
