she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
