I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize