i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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